***I published this post three years ago during the holiday season. I look back on it every now and then and it still resonates with me; still serves to remind me that even though tomorrow is highly likely, it still isn’t guaranteed – for you or someone close to you. With the holidays and the new year upon us, I decided to share it again.***
IF TODAY WAS THEIR LAST DAY
You often hear the saying, “Live each day as if it’s your last“. It sounds like quite an exciting way to live one’s life, yes? I’m a believer, however, that living each and every day in such a manner would surely burn you out by around day 46. Why the need for such urgency? I mean, less than 1% of the world’s population dies each day so the percentages that you’ll live to see tomorrow are heavily in your favor. You never know, though, do you? Now, imagine if it wasn’t your last day but *their* last day? Another person in your life; a friend, family member, spouse, loved one. What if someone you cared for wasn’t going to wake up tomorrow morning and neither one of you knew it?
Oh, and they were spending their last night with you?
THE LAST DAY
Victor was a fellow videographer who I met at a local professional videographers association meeting. We hit it off well from the beginning and over time had become good friends. I hired him for several of my own video productions, even bringing him with me up to Orlando one time for an overnight video shoot. You can learn a lot from a person when you spend over 6 hours with them in a car. What I liked best about him was his professionalism and easy-going style. He was the kind of guy you liked within a few minutes, he radiated health and positive energy and was always smiling. You don’t meet too many people like that.
Several months had gone by without us speaking (for no particular reason) until one day I found myself videotaping an afternoon wedding with a photographer who I knew was also friends with Victor. Near the end of the shoot, I asked him if he had seen or spoken with Victor lately. He paused and looked at me quizzically for a second before he said,
“You haven’t heard?”
Heard what?
“Victor had a heart attack.”
A heart attack?!
“Yeah.”
Did he die?
“No, he’s doing OK. He’s staying with his sister in Miami.”
Oh.
I called Victor as soon as I got to my car. He told me he had survived what doctors call a “Widow Maker” heart attack. He said he had felt a sudden pain in his chest and checked himself into the nearest hospital. That’s when the heart attack occurred. “My doctor told me I’m lucky to be alive” he said. “Most people don’t survive those kinds of heart attacks.” He went on to say that he was feeling good and was staying at his sister’s house in downtown Miami while he recovered.
The next month, I arranged with Victor to stop by his sister’s house and visit him as my wife and I were driving back home from a holiday party we were attending in Miami. We arrived at his sister’s house a little after 9pm. Victor was glad to see me and it was good to see him. He looked amazingly well – you’d never know that he had survived a lethal heart attack just a few months earlier. He introduced my wife and I to his sister and her teenage son and daughter – they all made us feel very welcome. To our surprise, the sister had prepared a meal for us so we all sat down to eat together.
Over the next two hours, we ate, drank wine, talked and laughed – a lot. It was as if we were all old friends. It was a shame to have to leave but we promised our daughter’s sitter that we’d be home no later than midnight. Before leaving, we shared a couple more laughs and then it was time for farewell hugs. As we got into our car and pulled away, we saw Victor and his sister waving to us from the front of the house. Victor had a huge grin on his face.
It was the last time I would see him alive.
THE DAY AFTER THE LAST DAY
Late the next morning, I called Victor’s cell phone to thank him and his sister for their hospitality. It wasn’t his voice I heard when the phone was answered but rather the voice of his nephew. I asked if Victor was around. There was an unusually long pause on the other end of the line before I heard, “Well, I don’t know how to tell you this but…Victor died in his sleep last night.” My blood suddenly ran cold. Surely this was some sort of joke. “When we went to his room this morning, we found him dead in his bed.” All the saliva in my mouth seemed to have dried up and I was barely able to muster, “He died? How could that be?” Now, this was a person who was eating, drinking, and laughing with us just the night before. Dead? The nephew went on to tell me, “The paramedics said he must have had another heart attack in his sleep. He didn’t survive this one.”
After regaining my senses somewhat, I expressed how shocked I was to hear the news and clumsily began offering my condolences. The nephew then told me, “You know, it’s the weirdest thing. Last night was the happiest he’s been since he had the heart attack. I’d never seen him in such a good mood. He never plays video games but after you guys left, he played video games with us until three in the morning. He was so happy that you guys had come over.” I was speechless.
Needless to say, my wife was visibly shaken and stunned when I told her what had happened. Even the news about how happy he had been after we had left did little to raise her spirits, or mine; what had happened was just too weird. Later that week, we were on our way to Victor’s funeral. When we arrived, I sought out Victor’s sister. Upon seeing my wife and I, she rushed over to us with tears in her eyes. As we embraced, she began to tell us how happy our visit had made Victor, how he hadn’t been in such a good mood in months. In a strange way, it began to make my wife and I feel good that with no knowledge of what the future would hold, we had helped make another human being’s last night on Earth a special one.

THEIR LAST DAY?
Victor died at forty years old. He had no wife or children. I was far from his best friend but at the funeral I met many of his friends and loved ones that surely wished they had seen him once more before he passed. Which brings me back to that overused phrase: “Live each day as if it’s your last”. We hear it often enough but only a very rare few can actually live their lives that way. It’s too damn hard to squeeze every possible sliver of life out of every single day, right?
But what if we spun it around a bit so that it applied not to us but to our family and friends; our loved ones? That we live each day as if it might be *their* last? That we cherish the time spent with those we love – that we make sure we find a reason to laugh together and that when we say goodbye, there’s nothing left unsaid. That we put aside petty differences and say, “I forgive you” and “I’m sorry”. That we not take the special people in our life for granted but rather, we let them know that we’re thankful for them, that we love them.
Because they may not wake up the next morning.
[Photographs by Ric Capucho]
85 comments
Wow, very moving and profound. God’s plan for our lives is so simple, that we tend to embellish it with all sorts of ambitions, goals and to do’s. We don’t need to make a million dollars or change the lives of millions. We just have to love well. Love the ones God puts in our path, even when we’d rather give in to petty grievances. When all is said and done and I’m breathing my last, the only thing that will matter to me is that I loved well. Thanks so much for sharing.
Sandi, So true. I always say to my mother, “I just sit in the back seat and let God do the driving.” Sometimes we miss the substance by grasping at shadows, yes? It’s OK to have goals and ambition but just don’t forget to appreciate the good people in your life.
For what is your life? It is even a vapor, that appears for a little time, and then vanishes away. ~James 4:14
Thank you, my friend. Let’s get together again soon 🙂
I DO have a similar story. In 1993, my sister in law Ann died in her sleep at the age of 30. She left behind a 6 year old, a 3 year old, and a six month old infant. It turns out (in retrospect) that she had Long QT syndrome, a hereditary heart arrhythmia. It also turns out quite a few family members (including her daughters) have it and have been able to take precautions which will undoubtedly save their lives. I always, always think about my husband telling me the night before “you ought to call Ann and tell her the house was painted (we were buying a townhouse from them and the painting was one step in the deal).” I blew him off, not really believing in chit chat for something trivial like that. The conversation would not have been deep, but it would have been one last connection. Every time I yell at my kids, am sarcastic with my spouse, or fail to fully listen to someone who is sharing something personal with me, Ann comes to mind. I still fail as often (or more often) than I succeed in being fully present and accepting/patient, but I guess consciousness is the first step. It can also be paralyzing — there are times when I just have to forge ahead.
I am sorry about your friend, grateful you had that time together, and for the lessons you learned; I think this blog will make a lot of people think twice.
(Ann’s death and the ramifications are a small part of this blog of mine: http://waytenmom.blogspot.com/2010_06_01_archive.html)
Paula, thank you for taking the time to read, RT, post on facebook, & comment – much appreciated. Moreover, thank you for sharing your own story. I’m sorry for the loss of your sister, we never know when someone we love will leave us. But I’m sure you can recall many memorable moments you shared with your sister, yes? Those memories is what makes the loss a bit easier to take.
Back in August of 1991, I was awakened by my mother and realized there were paramedics in our apartment. My father had suffered a sudden heart attack. He would pass away at the hospital several hours later. He was only 50.
My father was not a man of many words but of my four brothers & two sisters, I was the closest to him. The evening before he passed, I had spoken with him; even joked with him a bit – but several years earlier, I remember telling him I loved him (for the first time as a young man) and giving him a hug. It was an awkward moment for a man of few words but one that I cherish to this day, especially after his sudden passing.
Thanks, again for sharing *hug*
Dan, thank you for sharing this information. I have a not-that-expressive-relationship with my parents too.
As for Ann (my husband’s sister), yes there are lots of memories, and I view every moment I spend with her children who are now young adults, as my service to her legacy.
That conversation between you and your dad several years before he passed away may have felt awkward, but it is so important that you said it.
What kinds of films are you involved in?
Paula
Really moving post, Dan. And beautiful photography.
Thanks for sharing.
It’s to bad that it takes something like this, for you, me, everyone to live their life with purpose.
You really dont know when today will be your last, or your last with 100 health. Life is hard man, stressing the small stuff is a waste of time..
Silver lining is your friend passed with a smile on his face thanks to you and your wife.
John, I think people that have gone through what you & my wife have gone through (kidney transplants), it puts things in a whole new perspective, yes? Life is fragile, enjoy the good times and don’t sweat the small stuff.
Thanks for your support!
Great blog post, Dan. Thanks for telling the story and conveying a positive, important message.
Jon, thanks for taking the time to read & comment – glad you enjoyed it.
What a great story. Well done on being there for your friend. Sometimes I am surprised at who influences me for the best. This is a great reminder for me to be that influence too. Thank you.
Love your photos.
Sheila, thanks for taking the time to read & comment. You never know who can make an impact in your life so make sure you don’t miss it 🙂
What a fantastic story. Thank you for reminding us to live life to the fullest and that we do make a difference.
Carolyn, I’m not all mojitos, chancletazos & handcuffs, yes? Thanks for taking the time to read, glad you enjoyed it. I look forward to giving you a real hug one day 🙂
thanks for sharing this Dan. It was very personal enlightening and I am proud to call you a friend.
It takes a lot to dig deep inside and look at yourself.
Thanks for giving me inspiration!
Much Love,
Jessica
Jessica, you’re fast becoming one of my fave people in the twitterverse – thank you for your support, I know we’re gonna do our own thing one day and it’s gonna be big! *HUG*
Dan
My condolences to you and your wife as death is never easy. It is comforting to know though that he was happy. In the hustle and bustle of everyday life where people are trying to get ahead so many pass over an opportunity to spend time with someone as it is expected that they will be there tomorrow. Mostly that is the case and then tomorrow becomes the next day and so on.
This is a very emotionally filled post that is a big reminder for us that our friendships are precious to us and to maximize the time we have with people.
Suzanne, Always good to see you in my timeline and here in my modest blog 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to read & comment. The point here is to not only appreciate the people you love but to make the time spent together a memorable one, especially when you don’t see them every day. Hope one day we get to meet up, I got a hug all ready for you 🙂
Dan
Your blog and your work are so worth looking at, reading and viewing. I will meet you at blogworld and I will take that hug (be kind, I am only 5’1).
We get so wrapped up in our own lives that time passes us by and people that we care about get put to the side. Being 2500 miles away from my family and my core group of friends gets harder as we do not ever have the time to really enjoy one another (although my mom calls every day at the same time despite knowing I am not a fan of the phone; but rest assured I answer). The funny part is that every day and almost every minute, some is waiting to hear from us but never really think about it that way until they are gone and we are kicking ourselves for not being more responsive.
Certainly we will talk more when I meet you.
I’m also a long way from my family in NYC so I can relate 100%! Looking forward to finally meeting you in Vegas 🙂
Dan
Your post is beautifully written and your message powerful and so important, thank you! I am sorry for your loss and for Victor’s family. Last year I lost a long time friend, someone very dear to me, to suicide. It was devastating to me – yet I found great comfort in the last time I saw him….just days before he made that difficult choice. I’d been to a dinner party he was at and we had a blast. He said that evening it had been a long time since he had laughed that hard. He and I had been friends for many many years. As we parted that night, he hugged me tight and I said – “you know I love you” – he grinned big and hugged me again, and said in a way only he could say “back at ya” While I miss him dearly, I’m glad we had that moment. Life is short and we are writing a story with our lives, I want mine to be one of love, laugher, and goodness. I love your post although it must have been hard to write but the chapter of your life you wrote that night with Victor is a wonderful one for all of you. Thank you again for sharing this story. It moved me and I’m grateful.
Robyn, thanks for reading as well as for sharing your story. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Your story is very close to my own experience. That “moment” that you describe, as bittersweet as it may be, is one that we’ll cherish to our last days, yes?
Now, I don’t wanna live my life in fear of the people I love suddenly passing but I can assure you that I’m not gonna let petty differences come between my close friends and the people I love and I’m gonna make sure our time spent together is not wasted. That way, if the worst should come to pass, I’ll also feel good about that “moment”.
Thanks, again. *hug*
Thank-you for sharing your story – I am sorry for your loss .. what a gift to have had that last evening with Victor and his family – Your story inspires me to remember to be more present, accepting and loving towards those I love – to remember not to take any of this time we have for granted.
Thank-you,
Andrea
Drea, Life isn’t long enough to not enjoy our close friends & loved ones, yes? Thank you 🙂
Dan, So many times I find myself saying “no, I can’t go this time.” Or maybe we can catch up with you another time. You made a point to see him – to catch up. You made a point to be a friend. It would’ve been easy to skip seeing him after the holiday party. But you didn’t. You went ahead and dropped by. Thanks for writing about this. Thanks for taking the extra time and sharing a few laughs with a friend.
Doug, Thanks for reading & commenting. It was just one of those weird things in life that happened here. I don’t think, “I should go visit Bob, he might die tomorrow.” but if I do go see Bob, I’m gonna make sure that I make the visit a pleasant one…just in case 🙂
Your story reaches in and shines new light on the “live each day as if it’s your last” perspective and reveals a deeper understanding of what it means to live and love. Thank you 🙂
Hi Dan – Your story just reinforces what I’ve believed all my life, “Live each day as if it’s your last.” But I especially love the twist of looking outward and applying it to family and friends you love. Since my mom’s passing (which has haunted me for a long time since I actually heard her last breath), I’ve realized how fragile life is and how important it is to cherish those you love. Thank you for this touching post…you’re quite an amazing man! ♥
Kathy, you were one of my first twitter friends, it’s so good to see you here on my modest blog. I’m sorry to hear about your mother – I’m sure you have plenty of good memories that help you pull through. That’s all we’re left with, isn’t it?
My father died suddenly (and very unexpectedly) of a heart attack one morning back in 1991 – he was only 50. My wife has gone through two kidney transplants and a very complicated heart surgery (performed by none other than Dr. Oz!) so I know how fragile our lives can be (she’s doing very well, by the way!). She’s the one that really convinced me to write this post, it took weeks to finish it.
Now I don’t want to live my life in fear of those I love suddenly dying but after what happened with Victor, you can rest assured I’m not going to waste those moments…because you never know, do you?
It means a lot to me to see you here…thank you. *hug*
What an incredible & moving article. Thank you Dan, this “hits home” for me as well. I very recently lost my Grandfather (my last remaining grandparent and my personal hero) just a few weeks ago. Several weeks ago I had flown “home” to Chicago to see my family & friends. It was my annual “birthday” trip at the end of August being that my younger brother’s birthday is Aug. 12th, mine is Aug. 23rd, & my Grandfather’s was Sept. 1st (his 92nd). So we were able to spend some time together which was always a great pleasure, but I keep going back to the day I left and I said my good byes to him at the airport (he came along for the ride) and told him I would see him soon, hopefully around the holidays. It would unfortunately be the last time I would speak with him or see him alive… he passed away just 10 days later (9 days after his birthday). I keep going back to that trip and how I would have spent more time with him or maybe stayed a few days extra just to hang out more if I knew he wouldn’t be around the next time I came home. I know he lived a very full life and it’s not that shocking when someone in their 90’s passes away suddenly, but if only I could take just one last trip to hang out with him. Thanks again for a great article and sorry about your friend… I know you’ll cherish that last night you were able to hang-out with a smile upon your face.
Matt, You know, that’s the thing when people we love pass on – the memories we have with them; the times they were there for us during the good and bad times in our lives. I’m sorry about your grandfather and even though you wished you have spent more time with him, the fact that you were able to see him so near the time of his passing must be comforting.
We never know when someone we love is going to leave us forever, my father woke up to a sudden heart attack that he would never recover from – he would pass away at the hospital several hours later, at only 50 years old. But even though my dad was not a man of many words, I had spoken to him the night before, even joked with him a bit. But we had played catch together, laughed watching “Sanford & Son” on TV, celebrated together when Daryl Strawberry hit a titanic homerun off St. Louis’ Ken Dayley in the 11th inning in 1985, watched game 6 of the 1986 World Series together; we had several moments. I’m sure you had many great memories with your grandfather as well.
Matt, thanks for taking the time to read and share your own story. You’re one of my twitter “homies” and a great supporter so it’s good to see you here…lunch soon?
PS – I’ll sign up for 92 years old (and still able to make a ride to the airport) right now 🙂
Honey,
Glad you enjoyed it – hope to see you back here again 🙂
Wow! this is really quite moving. thank you so much for sharing it with the world. Strangely, this hit me in terms of customer service more than a personal story, but the net effect may even be greater.
Thanks again Dan, I continually enjoy your stuff.
Joe
Joe, You & I both, trust me 🙂
Thanks for taking the time to read & comment.
Wow! That was really powerful and moving. What a shift the change in perspective from my last day to their last day brings – thank you!.
Shalini, thanks for taking the time to read & comment – I had a feeling you would enjoy the post. *Hug*
Thank you for writing this post Dan.
It is a powerful and personal story that I’m glad you shared. Very few of us will have a similar experience as the one that you shared but there are so many important lessons to learn from this story.
[…] sharing a very personal story about losing a friend unexpectedly, Dan Perez asked: “What if someone you cared for wasn’t going to wake up tomorrow […]
Being a nurse who falls in love with her patients I have a bundle. Thanks for the encouragement to live each day as an investment. A beautiful story glad you were there for Victor.
How interesting is life? I am reading this while at my parents commenorating the life of my great aunt (who I barely knew) who died today at 95. It was not a huge surprise, but it kind of was. My mom and aunt were in the room with her talking. They stepped out for just a few minutes. When they came back in, she had passed.
I love this perspective. Live as if every day is *their* last.
Dan, your post is so beautifully written & the emotions expressed so wonderfully driven home via your use of pictures. We do all too often take our time here on earth for granted, we neglect to let those we care about it know how much we appreciate them! Thank you so much for this wonderfully written post, it was a real treat for a Sat morning!
I’ve gotten such great response to this post and I almost didn’t write it. My wife convinced me to share the story. We often do take the people we care about for granted. Let’s make that time count…just in case, yes?
Glad you enjoyed it 🙂
Thanks for the great article Dan! A very powerful and moving story! I do know from experience you cannot count on ever seeing someone again. The summer of 88 I said goodbye to my 17 year old brother, a week before Christmas of 88 he was dead of a gunshot wound to the head, inflicted by drug dealers his roommate was associated with. I learned my lesson then, never count on tomorrow. Take care!
Scott, Sorry to hear about your brother. Sometimes life doesn’t pull any punches and hits you hard, doesn’t it? Good thing is there’s always a lesson to be learned.
Thanks for taking the time to read & comment – much appreciated.
I went to a funeral of the father of a friend from high school last week. Roland Mazotti was one of the founders of the Everglades Bike club. At 75 years old he rode bikes several times a week…I mean serious riding for many..many years..maybe since he was a teen. Anyway, he had a heart attack while he was riding his bike right about to go up the Key Biscayne bridge. While sad…he died doing what he loved.
whoah this puts tears in my eyes… Our landlord passed away last week. Young guy, in his late 40s. Heart attacked too. His sudden death has been on my mind this weekend 🙁
Life is a gift. Can be taken from us at any time at any moment. I have a quote framed in my bathroom called BREATHE. “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive. To breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”
Its the first thing I read when I wake up to give God thanks for a new day.
Thx for sharing your story
Vanessa
Vanessa, Every time I think of putting this post on the shelf, I get a reaction like yours that keeps me putting it up at least a few times daily. I’ve gotten such a tremendous response from this post that it’s going to be hard to top. Sorry to hear about your landlord – what a shame he was taken away so young but life doesn’t always play by the rules. It truly is a privilege to breathe the air so let’s make the most of our days – especially with the ones we love.
Thank you for reading as well as for your comment – hope to see you back again…un abrazo 🙂
Vanessa, very true. Sorry to hear about your landlord – same age as Victor; same cause of death. Life isn’t always fair, yes? It takes an experience like this for us to realize how fragile life can be. I’m gonna try not to live my life with the fear of one of the people I love not waking up the next day but to make sure that I’ve brought joy & happiness to that person’s life. Because in the end, those memories are all we’ll have left…
Always good to see South Florida peeps here at my modest blog, thanks for the comment – hope to see you back here soon. Un abrazo 🙂
Thanks so much for this, Dan. It’s a truism I keep in the forefront of my mind, and you’ve expressed it so beautifully.
Forgot to mention…”Held” by Natalie Grant. This is a beautiful song that talks about a moment like this, the feelings, thoughts and the non-explanation to the whys. I lost a friend to cancer last year and since it’s “Pink Month”, she and this song came to mind. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOufqWodFNo
What a beautiful post, Dan. Such a sad story, but with an important message…that many of us forget all too quickly.
Elissa, always good to see that smiling face of yours. Sometimes it takes something like this to really make us realize how fragile life can be.
Thanks for stopping by. Hug 🙂
This was a terrific blog. My husband died fifteen years ago when our daughters were young. I am sure the last thing we said to each other was “I love you” because we said it every time we left the house. To this day, I talk to each of my girls every day and the last thing I say on the phone is “I love you”. Every time they (or I) leave the house, I give whichever one is there a hug and kiss. Yes, we had our fights – they did go through their teenage years, after all, and there were times they drove me CRAZY but, in the back of my mind was always that if something happened as a result of just whatever crazy teenage thing they did or just random chance (one daughter was running down the street as the second World Trade Center Tower collapsed, thankfully, she was fine) – the last words they heard from me would have been “I love you”
Ann, I can only imagine what it’s like to lose a spouse, sorry to hear about your loss. One thing I can tell by your site is that you’ve not let it keep you down. That’s all we can do sometimes is just keep moving forward, yes?
It seems crazy to think that every time we wave goodbye at a loved one that it might be the last time we see them but it’s a reality. I just try to make sure that if the worst should happen, I’ve been responsible for many happy days and lots of laughter in that person’s life.
Thanks for stopping by as well as for your comment – hope to see you back!
Several months had gone by without us speaking (for no particular reason) until one day I found myself videotaping an afternoon wedding with a photographer who I knew was also friends with Victor. Its a great post! Thanks for the post!
Thank you for sharing your heart with us…beautiful reminder to all of us in honor of your friend. Thank you for the reminder of how precious life is and how important time we spend with friends and family does make a difference.
My Mom passed away at 42 years old, cerebral hemorrhage. I was 19. I had just seen her the week before she had the hemorrhage. She showed up at my door, a day early for her weekend visit. She had a wicked sense of humor and knew I would be cleaning, cooking, shopping for their visit, etc. In other words, I would be a total mess! She knocked, with this giant knowing smile and we proceeded to have an awesome visit! I still smile to this day, though I miss her terribly.
Vickie,
That’s all we have left when we lose a loved one, yes? Those memories that bring a smile to our face. Sorry to hear about your mother. I lost my father at 22 years old (he was only 50). He was not a man of many words but I fondly remember watching Mets games with him (many losing seasons!), how we used to laugh together watching “Sanford & Son”, the weekends he spent fixing my car.
It’s about creating great memories and not wasting them. Thanks for reading as well as for your comment 🙂
If Today Was Their Last Day.This is just an outstanding article…great read! Thanks for sharing the post with us!
He paused and looked at me quizzically for a second before he said, “You haven’t heard?” This is an awesome article!
Loved going through the site…great article!!
[…] it’s sobering, it tugged at my heartstrings so much that I wanted to share it today. Read it. Perhaps it will resonate with you, as much as it did […]
WOW, I am practically speechless. Dealing with a very difficult situation and person right now I find it hard to be forgiving. Which is very unusual for me I am such a forgiving person sometimes to my own detriment.
Funny thing I am discovering, you have to be willing to also let go of people who are not in alignment with the values you create your life.
Listening to you deal with this death has me asking myself hard questions. Sometimes it is spending more time with people and other times it is being willing to let go of some people and move on so you are where you are suppose to be for your life.
I am going to ask myself now is this the person I want to spend my last day with? (Might change who you are willing to invest your time with daily)
Michele,
Didn’t see your comment until today. Thank you for taking the time to stop by my modest blog.
Just about everyone has been where you are right now. Sometimes we have to move on from people & situations that hold us back – it can be very difficult. But when the people around us are not, as you stated, in alignment with our values, it complicates all areas of our lives. I wish you the best in your decision…and a hug 🙂
Article!!
Thank you for sharing your heartfelt story.
Brian,
Glad you enjoyed it – hope to see you back here again 🙂
This is the coolest thing ever!!! Thanks for sharing
Hey Dan,
Thank you for sharing such a personal story… it is a very awakening story for many I am sure, myself included.
Unfortunately we all fall into the “life gets in the way” excuse and that is truly all it is, an excuse… an excuse not to tell the people you love that you love them, not to tell those close to you just how special they are because one day, we are not going to have the chance.
Thanks again and here’s to a wonderful, blessed and joyous holiday for you and your family.
All the best,
Steve O
Steve,
Glad to see you here at me modest blog. Life can be too short for some, yes? Excuses will only haunt us if we don’t put them aside and find a reason to connect with those we love.
Glad you enjoyed it – hope to see you back 🙂
Cd, you’re absolutely right – and especially now, during the holidays, is a great time to put that pettiness aside and get on with what’s good.
Thanks for stopping by – see you in March 🙂
It’s good when we can act on time. I couldn’t do it and lost a dear brother who choosed to die. I arrived late to tell him how much he was important to me. You just made my tears wash my face, Dan.
Type your reply…
Linda,
This post has had an affect on people that I could not have ever imagined. And I almost didn’t write it. I’m very sorry to hear about your brother. Victor was only a friend – I could only imagine how I would have felt had he been a brother. I’m sure that your brother knew how you felt. We can’t always be by our loved one’s side on their last day but it’s all the moments of love and laughter that precede that last day that’s important.
Thank you for taking the time to read & write – un abrazo.
Dan, you have a way of lifting my spirits with just one tweet. It doesn’t surprise me that you can make a spirit soar. You have and you do.
[…] NOTE: This post originally appeared over at DanPerezFilms.com […]
As a mother to two kids who’ve survived many things including kidney failure and transplants, dialysis and debilitating depression leading to suicidal tendencies in one of them when he was 9, I have to say I think about their mortality a lot. Knowing that they’ll need another kidney or two to live an average life span I hope I do give them good times and smiles every single solitary day, even if it’s just to laugh, tease, tickle and snuggle.
[…] 9. If Today Was Their Last Day, by Dan Perez […]
So many valid and heart warming points in this post. Some one close to me was ill. My ex let me know he was ill and he seemed to be recovering. I was shopping yesterday and decided to go and visit him in hospital. He appeared to be his usual self except for all the tubes. The feedback I got from family was he was expected to die yesterday so they took out all the tubes. The doctor visited him the next day and said he was putting him back on medication and oxygen because he was not giving up and appeared to be stable instead of getting worse as they expected. I stayed a while. He was in good spirits, laughing and joking his voice muffled by the breathing apparatus. I laughed and joked with him telling him to keep exercising. He said he was going dancing. I was hopeful he may pull through when I left and he smiled and grabbed my hand. He was always so full of life. He joked he did not want to go to sleep because he might not wake up. I left happy and grateful I went to see him. I rang my ex later and she said she had just left and he was okay. His son was with him. 1 hour later my son rang me and said his grandad had passed. I said a prayer for him, read my bible and was sad I would not get the chance again to see him. I will always remember his smile and banter. He was kind of person who was full of life and lived it to the full. He was great father in law and I am grateful I got to share some of the good times with him.
I am sorry to hear about your friend Dan. I hope he is at peace and he gets to meet my father in law and share a beer in the saloon in the sky.
Respect
Life is a fragile thing, yes? We’re lucky to be able to share a laugh with a loved one not knowing that that will be the last moment we spend with them. Glad you got that opportunity.
Cheers 🙂
[…] This post originally appeared over at DanPerezFilms.com […]
Thank you for reposting this, Dan. You are a deep thinker, my friend, and you’ve been able to do the best things possible from a sad story: learn from it and share what you’ve learned.
Excellent article/post/story Dan. Even three years later it is still relevant and true. beautifully written. A lot of people think that living each day as if it is your last means to do something extraordinary or crazy, that’s a misconception. I believe to live each day as if it’s your last is to say the things you mean, be true to your values and make sure that the people you touch each day know what they mean to you. Sure we all have tough days, where perhaps we don’t do as good a job of accomplishing this, but really if you take the time to look around you, you will see everything there is to be grateful for, I believe it is worth saying it, and thinking it, and then you can live each day as if it’s your last. In the end, woudl the cheap thrill of jumping out of a plane really make your life, or would it simply be seeing the people you love smile.
Victors last day was awesome, and maybe it all worked out that way for some reason. It is very special to have been a part of it, and then the inspiration to share this with all of us, adds more meaning. Perhaps, as the new year comes upon us, this will inspire everyone to live each day as if it was their last, and leave a path of kindness, lack of fear to live life- but rather embracing life- and a trail and appreciation and smiles behind us in our lives. What more could a person want?
Mila,
I’m not so sure most people who use that term really understand what it means. It can also be interpreted a number of ways. In short, I don’t believe it’s possible – our human nature just won’t allow it. However, learning from our bad days can help bring about better days, yes? That we can certainly strive for in this life.
Thanks for the lovely comment 🙂
John, my cousin posted on of your videos. He said it profoundly effected him….so I watched the “The Last Day”. Now, here’s my tissue box, which is empty, and my sincere jealousy. God has given to you a talent worthy to be jealous of. As a middle aged woman, former RN and every day I wonder, maybe today will be my “Last Day:, a result of the empty heart, and crazy need to be used, it’s my honor and pleasure to have been introduced to your work. God bless and grant you many years.
Ymaria,
Thank you for your kind words – glad you enjoyed the post. And you can’t possibly have an empty heart if you were ever an RN.
Sending you a hug 🙂